Fri, Mar 3rd - 11:56AM

Failure of Self-Help Movement

Hello, my name is Dean Lovett, author of "Still Hope for the American Family".  My first blog goes to the heart of the book's message - the reason that I wrote the book. 

After growing up in the 1960s and 1970s and observing American culture today, I believe the "Self-Help Movement," or what I call the "Me Movement," has been an utter failure.  This movement began about forty years ago and has left a sea of misery in its wake.  We've witnessed increases in divorce; dysfunctional families; fatherless children; suicide; druge usage; homelessness; child abuse; sexual predators; violence in schools; and the list goes on.

Yet, still today, bookstores overflow with self-help books and American continues its unabated quest for self-fulfillment.  The forgotten irony is that successful families produce contented and fufilled individuals.  Losing ourselves in serving others (beginning with family) enables us to discover ourselves and live truly meaningful lives.  I believe that we cannot find individual joy and significance without FIRST creating strong and successful families.

Of course, this flies in the face of everything the world teaches us.  All around us, we are pummeled with messages of self-gratification, self-achievement, self-improvement, self-actualization - SELF!  I'm not knocking the pursuit of "self" for the sake of sounding pious or "holier than thou."  I'm saying, "It doesn't work!"  I spent nearly two decades immersed in self-help books and couldn't raise myself to the person I wanted to be.  At the age of 37, I finally learned God's truth - I am only here to serve others (beginning with my family) - and my life began changing in the all the ways I had desired.  In short, I began to find myself as I focused on my marriage, family and the needs of those around me. 

I know, this is quite counter-cultural today.  But, maybe what our culture needs most is an army of those who will reject its destructive and false messages regarding how to find happiness.  While most Christians will likely agree with these thoughts, the tragedy is that Christians experience about the same divorce rate (or family failures) as the secular world - 50%!  Sadly, this tells me that the body of Christ is largely embracing the pursuit of self and failing to create strong families.  Are Christians today largely "buying into" the self-actualization propaganda with which we are bombarded, in spite of deeply held faiths and biblical truths?  I welcome your thoughts!