“ Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.”

That is a quote frequently attributed to George Orwell, originating in his observation regarding Rudyard Kipling reverence for fighting men. It’s probably an improvement on such a quote involving the two men’s words by an anonymous person with a gift for a well-turned phrase.

November 11 is Veteran’s Day. November 10 was Marine Day celebrating their origination (more on that later). To not show favoritism, June 14 honors the birth of the U. S. Army. October 13 honors the U. S. Navy. August 1 honors the Coast Guard. In 1947 August 1 was established as a day to honor the Air Force, but it hasn’t been celebrated since 1949. I guess they feel that the third Saturday in May - Armed Forces Day - covers it for them.

However, November 11 is acknowledged in more countries as Armistice or Remembrance Day. It marked the end of what was formally known as “The Great War” at 11/11 at 11 ’o clock in 1918. Unfortunately, the “Great War” is now known as World War I, since it was followed by World War II. The optimism of the end of the first world war was undone with the beginning of the second. It marked the end of the Edwardian age, giving lie to many preconceptions society had formerly held about progress and the goodness of man. Now, almost a century later, there are still more veterans, still more evil to grieve over. There is still more to honor in all that is good, selfless and noble in these veterans: these rough men and tough women who lay their precious lives on the line. Still, we must never forget …..

“Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.”

In light of the events on Friday at Fort Hood, this day had an even greater poignancy. Ironically, the Marines were formed to deal with the Barbary Coast Pirates who terrorized ships and coasts for almost 300 years. During their reign of terror, it is estimated that 800,000 to 1.3 million Europeans were taken into slavery. They were also responsible for the enslavement of 28 million (!!!!) Africans, and were the suppliers for the slaves sold to European countries and the Colonies.They extorted tribute for safe conduct through the seas they roamed. The U. S. refused to pay this tribute and the Marines were formed. This is where the the saying, "Millions for defense, but not a penny for tribute' originated. The Marine Corps song commemorates this in the opening verse, “From the Halls of Montezuma / to the shores of Tripoli.” Tripoli is now in Libya. That is the reason that Thomas Jefferson had a Quran in his library; he wanted to understand the religion of these Pirates; he wanted to understand their ferocity. It took the actions of several countries to end this barbarism. Still, there are pirates hi-jacking, using their beliefs as an excuse to perpetrate violence coming out of their own perversity. And there are still good people willing to combat the evil perpetrated. And, as we saw on Friday, even here on our own soil there is threat, and blood spilled in our defense. There are not enough tears.

I can’t thank you enough, Veterans. Thank you. Because, “good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men (and tough women) stand ready to do violence on their behalf.” Because of You. Thank You.

To my young friend,

You asked me about 'when you know when it is time to have sex in a relationship.' I didn’t mean to be glib when I answered - “When you’re married.” Now that I think about it, that was a bit glib, though very true. I didn’t mean to just cut off conversation so quickly. So here is a more considered reply to what you asked.

It is true that the sex act is reserved for marriage. But in a way the whole relationship is about sex and the things that lead up to that one act are not so well spelled out. I recently heard a very good talk with a young pastor’s response to the question, “How far is ‘too far?’” His answer was, “That’s the wrong question, we should be asking, ‘How holy is ‘too holy?’” The point is not how far can we go our own way, but how close can we get to God. It seems incongruous, doesn’t it? Getting close to God by means of our relationship with someone we are dating, but it isn’t. In fact, it should accelerate our relationship with God, because we should be learning more about God through our relationship with that other person. God is the great Other, just as the person we are dating is other than us - the other gender, another way of thinking, of looking at the world. As we experience learning about the other person we should also experience learning about God.

My dear friend, the first thing you want to do is ground your relationship in prayer. If it is embarrassing to pray together now, when you’re trying to please each other, imagine how hard it will be if the relationship leads to marriage? If your friend finds it hard to pray, that person might not be a believer and 2 Corinthians 6:14 tells us not to yoke [bind or tie ] ourselves with unbelievers. This probably seems “unmerciful” or “judgmental.” It is the most merciful thing in the world! How unhappy will the unbeliever be if they find that they don’t have access to you on the deepest level of your heart, where you and Messiah meet? How alienating and rejecting that will be to be left out of the happiest place you exist. As for judgmental, you practice judgment everyday. When you choose to be kind, you’re using good judgment, when you decide to eat ice cream instead of supper, you’re practicing questionable judgment, and if you decide to jump off the Empire State Building without a parachute (even with one!) you’re practicing bad judgment. Dating someone who does not share your faith, and at the same maturity level or more is bad judgment. It reflects not on the person you’re dating, but on you because you’re making a choice that may effect negatively the rest of your life, and your children’s lives and even beyond their lives. I always liked this saying: ‘If he (or she) won’t go to heaven for you, why should you go to hell for them?’

Maybe I should have said this at the beginning, dating is for marriage. If you are not at a point in your life where you can or want to get married, don’t date. It’s just a mistake to put your emotions out there with no realistic way to gratify those feelings. If you’re inclined to eat chocolate, but for whatever reason know you shouldn’t eat it at this time. Don’t buy a chocolate bar and put in your backpack - it’ll get all beat-up and you’ll be thinking about it until it will be very hard to resist. All that spiritual and emotional intimacy will make resisting the physical very hard. Don’t date unless you’re planning to marry soon, it’s just torture otherwise.

Back to prayer, this is always a good place to go. You should begin and end your dates with it. That way the Originator of good marriages is kept at the center of the relationship. Have you noticed God is represented as a trinity? That’s what you and your mate (or future mate) should form - you, your mate and God as a trinity.

As for the kissing and necking, my personal thought is: wouldn’t be nice if the only person you’ve ever kissed is the person with whom you’re partnered for life? There are a variety of reasons for this. You never have to worry about what sort of shenanigans your partner was involved. Your partner is also freed of that worry. There’s no torment about whether you are as good at anything as their previous lovers; you don’t have to worry about diseases; you can be easy that your partner is as inexperienced as you and you can learn together. There’s a saying that I can’t find the attribution for right now, but it goes something like this - some think that loving many women is what makes a man. But a real man is some one who can love and satisfy one woman her whole life. Scripture tells of Mary and Joseph who were betrothed, they had not been married yet, but when he found her with child, he had to “put her away” get divorced, not just “break up with her.” He needed to do that so people knew that the reason Mary was pregnant was not him. It was a life or death decision because if the community chose, they could stone her to death. This is how serious a matter like this is.

Even more than this there is the problem of once started, it is difficult to stop and it natural to progress. One kiss leads to two and so forth. One very important thing to do is set boundaries on what you find mutually acceptable, and it needs to be the one who wants less who prevails. This is the way of our belief, bearing one another’s burdens (Ga 6:1-3). We must care for the “weaker brother” 1 Corinthians 8:11-12: Thus by your ‘knowledge’ this weak person is destroyed, this brother for whom the Messiah died; …so when you sin against the brothers by wounding their conscience when it is weak, you are sinning against the Messiah. If you or your date cannot abide by this now, it will make marriage extremely unhappy. It’s a good idea to create this atmosphere of respect. If either of you find respecting the other person’s boundaries difficult or impossible now, you’ll find this to be true for the rest of your relationship.

I want to be very clear about this. If I think that kissing is restrictive behavior, please understand that any sexual behavior is off limits. This includes anything that leads to orgasm, or gets one near that point. Sexual intercourse is not the only sexual act that is restricted. Do not do anything you would be embarrased if your father or mother would find out you are doing. Remember your Father in heaven.

The next thing I want to talk about how we treat each other in the form of the types of promises we make by our behavior. I’m not talking about kissing and petting, I’m talking about how we dress and act towards each other. How we dress and how we talk is as important. There is good instruction in 1 Thessalonians 4:3-7:

We know about holiness in church - respect, reverence, seriousness. How does this fit with such a wild thing as love and passion? It should, because we should be wild and passionate about God. That desperate feeling that we would do anything for Him, but we know we must be ruled by His will. Anything will not do. Only the right thing will do. The same for the man or woman we love. If we love them we must be even more sure we “do not wrong him (or her) in this matter.” One of those things is recognizing how God has created us so differently, so marvelously. Men are highly sensitive visually, and to make promises with the way you dress would qualify for “taking advantage” and it’s wrong. It is fun to be admired, but to elicit that admiration wrongly is dishonest. Women are extra sensitive emotionally, and to make tacit promises of love to get more physical intimacy is also lying. Admiration or friendship is not love, false promises in this area are as if you made false promises in a business dealing.

This leads to me to another issue rarely spoken about - the man’s role in safe-guarding the woman’s chastity. That's the joke about the intimidating father with the baseball bat, he's taking his role seriously in this matter. The role goes from the father to the husband. This is very important to be understood. If a man will do this, when they are married, their sex life will be so much sweeter because his bride will be able to trust him, she learned to trust him before they married. If a man will not guard a woman’s chastity, it is worth asking if he has the maturity for a relationship and marriage. It is also questionable whether he is someone one would want to marry. It is a gift the woman offers him at marriage, if he wants to steal that gift, what does that say about him? Ephesians 5:25-27 tells more about this:

Messiah wouldn’t cause a blemish, wrinkle or spot. A man worthy of marriage would not do that either. He will accountable for the happiness or sadness he caused his wife, as will a woman be before the Master. She, too, must be an active participant. The washing of the Word indicates that Bible study between the two of you is also quite appropriate, and a good habit for you to be in together. All this is to make a good marriage. Messiah is very clear about building a good foundation, building upon the Rock. Sex is God’s idea. If we follow the principles He lays down for it, the wonders and joys of it will more readily available to us within the boundaries of safety and security He has provided for us.

I love it; well, not really. See, I am partly Native American, though most non-Indians don’t seem to detect it. Native Americans do, like radar they hone in on me wanting to know my tribal affiliation. Normally this is not a problem, (in fact, it is a source of great rejoicing) except that my disguise makes me a sort of fly-trap for closet bigots. For some reason they feel an irresistible urge to make fun or express disparaging remarks about Native Americans in my presence, not suspecting my heritage, or how knowledgeable I am about American history in regards to Native Americans. Maybe subconsciously they detect my heritage and want to be refuted (best of motives), or maybe, subconsciously, they want to victimize an other Native American (the worst motive). Whatever the reason, it is very annoying.

So here it is. My own personal vitriol. I have a few things to say about this. First of all, this is my response to those who say, “Why don’t they just join society and do what we do? Other people have come here and had bad experiences and have overcome.“ Tell me what do you expect of people who were systematically hunted down and killed for centuries because of the simple fact that they owned the land coveted by these Western “Christians?” Just in that sentence alone there are 2 major sins - kill and covet. Before Westerners came here, there were 10 million Indigenous people; there are about 5 million now. Yes there seems to be a genetic weakness for alcohol in some Natives. I’m here to tell you that it isn’t the majority. I am a prime example. When a group of people have been invaded, hunted down, murdered, disenfranchised, faced with degradation [e.g., signs like: “no dogs or Indians allowed;” “nits make gnats” used as a motto for massacring women and children], corrupted purposefully by alcohol, robbed, and isolated, cheated and defrauded at every turn, how likely, I ask you, would it be for those people to think, “Hmmmm, what an exemplary group of people who have done this raping, killing and pillaging, I think I’ll become just like them!” Not very likely! Why would they want to become dishonorable, dishonest, cruel, selfish, individualistic to the point of egotism to forsake the very virtues of their own culture? Which though, not very successful in this culture, as this culture would judge them, they strive to retain the virtues that distinguish them from the culture that violated them. They strive to retain an obligation to their people, their family and that closeness. They value a sense of honesty, dignity and honor that they rarely experienced from the American people. In fact, the reason they don’t like to look people in the eye is because they don’t want to insult them by implying they are doubting their truthfulness by staring to search for their truthfulness. There is a joke in which a white-man says to a Native American: “Why do you not work hard from sun up to sun down advancing your wealth and advantage as we do?” The Native asked him, “Why would I do that when with a little effort I can both feed my family and tribe, and have leisure to enjoy my life?” “Why, so that you can build enough wealth to cease your striving and enjoy a comfortable retirement in old age, of course.” “But I already have enough to enjoy my life now! Why should I wait?” A great example of the different perspectives. This would be fine, if the white-man or the Native were redeemed - but if they aren’t, and it becomes an exercise in futility. However exemplary, nobility without Messiah is still fallen and ineffective.

Even worse, they have not been treated with respect or dignity by the very people who should be the most loving and respectful of the Image of God in which they were created - believers. I say this because the person precipitating this response is a believer. This is a disgrace to our nation and to true believers, especially. All the same, the answer is not for them “to go back to the ancient ways.” The ancient ways were filled with idolatry, superstition and oppression. There is now a sentimentality about them, that makes it a sort of rule not to tell them the truth of Messiah, but indulge their wrong beliefs. “They’ve suffered enough, let them alone.” This is as treacherous as giving them blankets infected with small pox. They need Messiah as much as anyone, whatever their past suffering - more so because of that suffering.

Nor is the answer syncretism - the combination of Christianity and native beliefs. God is revealed in scripture. That is the venue He chose. The principles in that book tell us how to conduct ourselves and idolatry is not allowed. The Roman Church uses saints very similarly to idols. Please don’t get me wrong. There are many things about the Roman Church that I respect - it’s understanding of our obligation to help the less fortunate, it’s commitment to preserve life and I believe there are many who love Messiah with all their hearts in it. Raised in the Roman Church, I was the beneficiary of many of its offerings. Unfortunately, a clear message on the way of salvation was not one of them. However that is fodder for a very different article. That said, the allowance by the church of syncretism is wrong. Its attitude towards saints predisposed it to overlook the type of syncretism practiced by some Native Americans in the Roman Church of the American southwest. They had little position to reject this abomination because they had already rejected the prophetic teaching against syncretism in the OT to take on their own pagan practice of worshipping saints. It is a very short jump from worshipping other entities like saints to nature spirits. There will those who say that the church officially discourages these practices. All the same, these rituals are often done in front of churches and incorporate “saints.”

Native Americans need neither the sentimental patronization of the current culture nor the syncretism of the Roman Church - they need the real Gospel of the Bible. They need the holy scriptures that tell us of our marvelous, amazing Lord in Spirit and in truth. Then having rejected their former error they would be free to apply that tremendous creativity of theirs to creating a Native ceremony of Christianity that may or may not look like Western Christianity, but is founded entirely upon the Word of God. A form that is free of idolatry and superstition, rejoicing in their Savior, and receive the healing they so profoundly need. Augustine said that our hearts are restless until they come to rest in Him. Their wounded hearts can finally rest in the God who heals, who loves and bring them to health through His Spirit and Truth. Then the suicide, the drinking, the violence, the despair can be made an end.

So to all you closet bigots, please spare me the nonsense of your feelings of superiority, and look to yourself and your culture for the blame of the plight of Native Americans. Next time you feel inclined to criticize or mock Native Americans, if you’re a believer, put on your running shoes and, don’t walk a mile in their moccasins. No, run to the nearest Native American and tell, in love and humility, of our Messiah. Tell them about His love, His sacrifice, of their great need and of His great sufficiency. Pour out God’s great heart to them and don’t stop until they see that the many sins against them had nothing to do with our Magnificent God, but the falseness, the fallenness of people like you … of people like me … of people like them. Which is why all of us so desperately need a savior. That is why we need Jesus of Nazareth. If you’re not a believer and follower of Jesus of Nazareth, you’ve got other worse problems. Get straight with God first - then precede to do the above.

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