Sat, Aug 25th - 9:45AM
Greetings
Wow. It has been almost a year since my last post. Alot has changed since then. Missy and I are in the process of getting a divorce :(. I've been reflecting alot lately and am trying to process everything as best as I can. First of all, let me say that I realize that I made alot of mistakes and have been questioning my comittment. I'm wrestling with feelings of self loathing and also dealing with negative feelings towards Missy as well. I know that we all need to take critical looks at ourselves and that is all part of the journey. However, why does it almost always seem like an attack when someone points out our faults? Some of it, I think, has to do with how the message is delivered. Even though we don't mean to, I feel that sometimes we deliver messages that our true but we forget to do it out of love. I'd love to hear from other folks about how they feel as well. I am going to try to be better at keeping this updated more frequently because I feel that if I get my thoughts out in the open that it may help me to heal and improve my walk with God. Thanks for reading this and God bless.
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Fri, Sep 29th - 11:31AM
Greetings
Hi all. It has been a while since my last post. I've been really busy working on the new house trying to get everything fixed up so that we could get our mortgage and get ready to move in. We are closing on the house today and Missy and I are very excited. This whole time, there have been tests and trials and the Lord has brought us through them all. The kids are back in school now and back to a routine. Jon just started 9th grade this year and is trying to deal with the transition from middle school to high school. At the same time, he is trying to transition from a sheltered emotional support class to the shark tank which is high school.
Jon got baptised earlier this month and Missy and I are so happy about that. The younger kids, Cheyenne and Auggie, continue to listen to the CD that they got at VBS. I know that they just like to listen to the music but can't help but think that those words are sinking in. Zach is still giving us a little bit of a hard time because he is having trouble giving up the care taker role. I feel bad that he had to take on that role so early and life and doesn't seem to be able to have normal relationships because he always wants to be in charge. On the lighter side, Libby has taken it upon herself to go into my wallet and take out my credit cards. At 2, she is already hitting Daddy up for money.
Missy and I have seen the Lord's blessing and guidance on this whole project and can't wait to see what is going to happen next. There have been a few times that we weren't sure how things were going to work out, but they did and we stayed on course. I pray the Lord's peace and blessing on everyone.
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Thu, Aug 24th - 10:35AM
Seeing progress
Proverbs 22:6 "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it."
When the youngest child, Libby, came to us she was unable to walk very well, knew very few words and was very lethargic. Libby was taken to the hospital on the day that we were having our oldest foster son Jon's birthday party. She looked very jaundiced and had bruises on her back. That is the reason that Children and Youth decided to pull the children from the home and placed them with us. At the time, she was diagnosed with failure to thrive and she was only 17 months old at that time. Because of the diagnosis, Children and Youth sent her case to an early intervention group for possible help. Early intervention is a group that helps children ages 1 - 3 years old with developmental deficiencies get services to help them grow and with all of the issues that she had, Libby sure seemed that she was going to need them.
None of our children had really been exposed to church or the Christian community very much before they came to us. They would attend on special occasions, baptisms and dedications, or on the major holidays, Christmas and Easter. While Missy and I were in Africa, the trip had been planned long before the younger kids came to live with us, my mother-in-law sent the kids to a local vacation bible school to give them something to do. The kids loved it and continue to sing the songs that they learned and now are having alot of fun going to the kids program at our home church.
Missy and I both knew that we would have to give these kids all of the love and instruction that we could and that they so desperately needed. I got to see some of the fruit of that work both yesterday and today. Last night, the Early intervention group came and assesed Libby and said that she will not require any services because she is doing so well and that there are some areas that need work, but that she is right on track for a 22 month old. This morning, Auggie and Cheyenne were playing house. When it came time for bed, I heard Auggie praying the prayer that Missy and I pray for them every night. He has also made it a point to let everyone know that we can't eat until someone prays for the meal. Again, I don't know what the future hold and whether these kids will be returned, but I pray that the lessons that they learn here will go with them all of their days. I pray peace and love for all in this world. Have a blessed day.
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Tue, Aug 22nd - 5:51PM
Conundrum
Today has been a fairly trying day and I am having a problem dealing with things. As any of you parents know, summer is a very trying time as the kids are off and are having trouble finding things to occupy their time. Unfortunately, I am oncall at work and can't take them outside so they are all together in close quarters. This, inevitably, has led to some arguements. I must admit that I have lost my temper a few times and raised my voice at the offending parties. We all require some extra grace at times and I guess today was my day. I know that it is just the way that the kids are and that they don't know any better but it still upset me. That got me thinking about the fine line that we have to walk between disciplining our kids and being too harsh.
In Proverbs 13:24 it states "He who spares the rod hates his son" but in Ephesians 6:4 it states "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord". I came to the realization some time ago that I can't expect my kids to live the way that God wants them to if they don't know His commands. I tried to get my oldest son to learn more by researching the Word when he misbehaved and showing him what the Lord said about his behavior but that didn't work too well because he would just shut down his mind. I need to get back to it, though, because hopefully some of it will sink in through osmosis or something else. Finally, I have learned that everything has to be tempered with love. I remember being spanked as a child and now know that what I recieved was to teach me that what I was doing was wrong and to try and keep me from going down the wrong path. Those were different times and I now try other methods such as rewarding the kids for doing the right thing and only giving time outs when they doi the wrong thing.
I am reminded daily when I look at the news of people who may have been too lenient or harsh with their children and now society is having to deal with the results. Just check out all of the robberies, gang violence and other crimes occuring today. Kids are screaming for some kind of structure and love in their lives. The best thing that we can do as Christians is to raise our kids according to the Lord's ways and let our kids be examples to other kids and hopefully that will show them how much they need Jesus in their lives. I pray that we all would step up to the plate and be the parents that He wants us to be. Without that, there is no hope for our society and our kids. Thanks for listening and have a blessed day!!
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Mon, Aug 21st - 10:41AM
Good news and Good times
Good morning and greetings in His name. God is so good. Over the weekend, we got the news that our current house had sold and that our offer on the new house had been accepted. The house had only been shown 3 times and we recieved 2 offers. The Lord sent the right people to us and we are grateful. Now the work really begins. For the past couple of weekends, we have taken the kids camping.
The kids enjoy going to the campsite because there is a pool and they get to be out in the woods. Missy and I really enjoy watching the kids play and goof around in the pool. It's also alot of fun watching the younger kids grow as they learn how to swim. I can't imagine not having these kids around. I know that there is always a possibility that they could be sent back to either of their birth parents. The hardest part about being a foster parent is that you have to deal with the kids when they come back from visits with their birth parents.
I understand that the kids need to keep their relationships with their birth parents but sometimes the visits seem to be counterproductive. We are asked to prepare to have these kids permanently, and that is something that we would love, but at the same time prepare for them to go back to either mom or dad. That paradox is sometimes hard to deal with and causes frustration and sadness at times. I am relying on the Lord, so whatever happens is OK because I know that He already has everything worked out. I have vowed to love these kids as much as I can while I have them.
Knowing the situation that the kids come from, I want to shower them with all of the love and affection that I can muster. I am so glad that the Lord has brought these kids into our lives and can't wait to see how they turn out. It is so great to hear them singing along to the worship songs on the CD they got at VBS. They are all very affectionate and want attention whenever they can get it. Even when the baby soils herself, she is so cute because she just enjoys interacting with Missy and me. Have a great and blessed day and may the Lord grant you peace, mercy, grace and love today! I will talk to you later if the Lord is willing and grants me some more time here on Earth!!
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Name: Chip Gaumer
