Sat, Jan 27th - 1:37PM
The "Little People"
From time to time the Holy Spirit crawls back behind our natural armor and cracks it open from the inside. Then He invades us with His thoughts, and as those thoughts pour out through the crack most of us perceive our increased vulnerability and immediately plug up the crack. So what would happen if we didn’t rush into the crack repair mode?
Several days ago I awoke before my alarm and began thinking of Jesse. Jesse was one of the “Little People” in my life, which would explain why I never think of him. I first became aware of Jesse in elementary school. He was strange looking, and with the typical cruelty of children I avoided him assiduously. He wasn’t unfriendly or extraordinarily dull, just funny looking and quiet. He had no friends. To make matters worse, he lived in a decidedly depressed neighborhood – the wrong side of town. As I grew up, Jesse really didn’t exist for me, although he was a classmate and peer. I wasn’t antagonistic to him in any way, rather I just totally ignored him. In fact, I forgot him so entirely that the other day I realized I had forgotten his last name and all the details of an incident that occurred years later.
Ironically, when I became a Christian decades later, I lived with my wife and infant children in an apartment building just up the street from Jesse. The incident I just referred to occurred within some scenario involving problems with my car, and I had an urgent need to fix the problem. This is all very vague to me now, but I do remember at the time that Jesse suddenly reappeared in my life, fixed the car problem, and just as suddenly stepped out of my life again. What bothers me about the incident the most is that I remember him treating me with absolute kindness and charity, and I didn’t deserve either. Then over 35 years later I awake with Jesse on my mind! Now that just has to be God!
This whole event begins to make sense to me when I consider that lately I’ve been thinking about how backwards God views life from how we view it. As I grew up, I would never have considered myself a snob or an arrogant person. Growing up in my childhood environment I well knew both types, but never would have classified myself that way. Yet now I can look back with devastating shame and realize I missed God’s best plans for my life by failing to accept the little, seeming insignificant people that were the “wallpaper” in my world.
God looks at the heart – we look only at the outward appearance. God never accepts us at face value, He already accepted us as He looked at our hearts. We have a real problem with recognizing true worth. I have a real problem with recognizing true worth – and I’m so sad I’m that way.
I really don’t know what to do about these thoughts of Jesse. I got up and dug out an old yearbook I had hidden in the garage – no photos of Jesse, and no mention of him. He apparently ducked the yearbook radar too. And now I’m left holding my bag of thoughts, including thoughts of my own arrogance and cruelty.
All I can say now is, Jesse was the better man. He was stronger, gentler, more forgiving and much more charitable than I ever was. Jesse, if I had it to do all over again, I’d be so honored to be your one friend.
God bless you wherever you are.
Comment (1)
|
Back to Blog Main Page
|
|
| About Me |
|
| Jan. 2007 |
|
| |
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
|
7 |
8 |
9 |
10 |
11 |
12 |
13 |
|
14 |
15 |
16 |
17 |
18 |
19 |
20 |
|
21 |
22 |
23 |
24 |
25 |
26 |
27
|
|
28 |
29 |
30 |
31 |
|
|
|
|
prev
|
|
next
|
|
|
Archives
|
| |
Name: John Miltenberger
